By Lillie Keenan

In elementary school, I came home with a report card in which my teacher noted I was “bossy”.  My mother assured me that if I were a boy, I’d be a “born leader” and to pay the comment no mind. But as I grew up, I realized I studied and retained information best by explaining things to someone else. My "bossiness" was actually a craving for clarity. Teaching others solidified my own understanding. When I graduated from college, I started tutoring because I missed the academic and intellectual exchange. There was something I felt I needed to unlock within myself outside of my own riding. As a competitor, I regularly review my results, studying what’s working and what isn’t through my consistency and hit rate in competition. Over the past twenty-four months, that trend has improved, and I have to ask myself why is this the case?

The relationship between a rider and a coach is a profound exercise in trust. Throughout my career I have had the privilege of learning from some of the best, including McLain Ward and Andre Dignelli. Young riders hand over an enormous amount of trust to their coaches; not only in tactical skills and horsemanship, but also how to interpret success, failure, progress and, most dangerously, our own self-worth. 

The relationship between a rider and a coach is a profound exercise in trust

As a child, Andre was a consistent voice in my life. He did not sugarcoat criticism, though his honesty allowed my confidence to bloom. The endless hours he spent teaching me and the consistency in his instruction coupled with his challenging lessons and high expectations built in me a foundation of resilience. 

Some years later when I had my first lesson with McLain, I was in a very different headspace. My confidence had been dismantled, leaving me in a state where my fear of disappointing a legend far outweighed any belief that I deserved to even be on a horse. I had lost my sense of self; the rider I used to be felt like a stranger I could no longer emulate. It is a vulnerable thing to stand before a master of the sport when you feel you have nothing to offer. But McLain changed that. It was through McLain’s unwavering standard of excellence that I began to find my footing again. He pulled me out of the mental trenches, seeing the potential in me that I no longer did. By holding me to the highest possible standard even when I could not hold myself to it, he forced me to reclaim my identity. McLain helped me realize that my 'self' is not something that could be taken away by a bad result or a loss of form, especially not by someone else’s words — it is something I choose to show up as every single day in the barn.

McLain helped me realize that my 'self' is not something that could be taken away by a bad result or a loss of form, especially not by someone else’s words — it is something I choose to show up as every single day in the barn

Plenty of my peers have questioned why I do not solely focus on my career competing in the ring. The answer is simple: fulfillment is not only found in my own results. In show jumping, even number 1 in the world at any given moment will not win more than 50% of the time. It is a losing game, by definition. As riders, it is in our nature to analyze and study our rounds obsessively — both the failures and the wins. If “failure” is defined as a loss and that is happening minimum 50% of the time, will I ever be happy? And consequently ride at my best?

Today, as I build my own business, that “dual-track” ambition is my daily reality. I am currently working with three young women and one Master’s rider, and through them, I see the cycle of mentorship beginning anew. My primary internal fire remains my own results, and I remain hungry for reaching my absolute ceiling on the international stage. Maintaining this balance is only possible because of the infrastructure I have built behind the scenes. My operation is a deliberate division of expertise that allows me to represent Team USA on the global circuit without compromising the integrity of my barn. My competition horses’ care and programs are upheld by my manager and head groom, Corentin Tual, whose meticulous eye ensures my equine partners are at their peak. Simultaneously, the teaching and trading part of the business is managed by my right hand, Diego Perez Bilbao. This internal synergy is the engine that allows me to travel the world, knowing every horse and student is receiving the elite standard of care they deserve.

Coaching anchors me; it ensures that while I am chasing the trophies, I am never losing sight of the craft

In a sport governed by clear rounds and podiums, we often mistake 'winning' for 'progress.' My students remind me of the critical truth that our highest potential is not found in a carbon copy of someone else’s ride, but rather in the relentless refinement of our own systems. Coaching anchors me; it ensures that while I am chasing the trophies, I am never losing sight of the craft. 

I am acutely aware of the power a coach holds. To effectively help my students, I must first achieve total clarity in my own mind. But my role carries a deeper mandate: horsemanship. I am adamant about teaching my students that our competition results are a secondary byproduct of the respect we afford the animal. To honor the horse is to understand that they are not tools for our ambition, but sentient partners in a high-stakes dialogue. By instilling a culture of meticulous care and empathy, I am reminded of the humility required to stay at the top. We are only as good as the trust our horses place in us. And this respect I have to believe permeates all areas of our lives. 

Ultimately, the 'born leader' my mother identified decades ago has found her purpose in the balance between personal ambition and professional integrity. While my primary drive remains centered on the pursuit of my success as a competitor, I have discovered that my results in the ring are bolstered, not burdened, by the responsibility I feel toward my students. McLain still must remind me to compartmentalize on occasion, and I am grateful to have a tiered system we have built that makes this possible. In a sport where success is often measured by the narrow margins of the clock, teaching provides a broader, more enduring metric of progress for me. It serves as a daily recalibration, stripping away the noise of comparison and returning me to a singular, vital truth: that the most sophisticated version of my own riding is found not by chasing external results, but by relentlessly refining my own system. While I continue to pursue the trophies and personal success, I do so now with the understanding that leading others is the surest way to find the path back to oneself.

4.3.2026 No reproduction of any of the content in this article will be accepted without a written permission, all rights reserved © World of Showjumping.com. If copyright violations occur, a penalty fee will apply.